Meeting Mr. Right - Part 3
Reading the "Match Report" from Earl on my first edition, grey, G3 desktop unit with a 21" monitor, I notice the unclipped nails on my fingertips as I type on my coffee stained keyboard. My roommate broke my nail clippers when he tried to clip his toenails, and I haven't had a chance to buy new ones. The "Healthy Menu" chicken fajita wrappers from McDonald's on my table top to the right of me are distracting, so I take a moment to crunch them into little paper balls and throw them in my Ikea wire basket.
Jean Pierre, I read from the "Match Report," is a French Canadian, with a Ph.D. in psychology, who has his own clinical practice and is a professor at UBC. Sounds good, so far - I do need a therapist. He loves going to art galleries, plays, string quartets and choirs. In addition to working out and rollerskating around the seawall, he's into contemporary fiction. Lovely. He's 6'2", 48 years old, moderately hairy and has a huge cock. This leaves me a bit confused. He's a little old for me, just by a decade, but I don't mind hair or huge cocks. Jean Pierre earns over $100,000 per year. Yikes! I feel very intimidated now. Jean-Pierre is spiritual (whatever that means).
My Outlook Express icon starts blinking rapidly after I read the "Match Report." I receive a picture of Jean-Pierre. I open his jpgs in IE, and look. I never considered myself to be superficial, or totally looks-based when choosing a partner (with all the variety of ex-bfs I've had in the past), but... I am extremely disappointed. I feel like a superficial circuit party boy when I see his picture. I disappoint myself.
He looks 48. Receding hairline. That's not so bad, but it's the round face and thick glasses that bother me. He's definitely someone you want to be your therapist, but your boyfriend? Not for me. I felt like I've lost my morals and values by my opinion. I just can't be interested in someone who looks like that. I feel terrible.
My heart sinks. So does my face, which I see reflected in my monitor. In the reflection, I suddenly see a superificial me. After all, Jean-Pierre is successful, educated, intelligent and has similar values, and a b.c. But can I imagine us going out on a date, relating well, but having no physical attraction? Yes. So what's the point of meeting up? I know Jean-Pierre has the expectation of dating. I just can't do it.
I show three friends his picture. They all say, "He's definitely not your type, physically." They know it right away. So sheepishly I tell Earl, "Jean-Pierre is not attractive enough for me. Even my friends know that."
Earl is livid. He writes in an e-mail, "I expect my matches to meet in person and make judgements from their meeting, rather than basing it on a photograph. He really does have a lot in common with you, and I think you're making a mistake."
Earl tells me later that he wrote to Jean-Pierre, telling him I'm not interested in meeting. In the meantime, I change my mind - I want to meet him and perhaps we can be friends? But Earl tells me it's too late.
My two closest friends have in the last eight months been dating university professors, who are older; not perfectly attractive, but have become involved with them. They're blissfully in love, because they're mature and intelligent and know how to treat a partner. I can't help wondering if I made a mistake...as usual.